Feelin not so good.

The alarm clock went off, thinking it was 7.30, I told John to phone mum and say I was not walking and was going to stay in bed most of the day  and not see a soul!!, but it was 6.30 and by the time it did go off at 7.30 I had changed my mind to walk. I was however feeling sorry for myself and fed up with the world.
Mum came to pick me up and I was having a cry, but  after a hug, off we go in the car to pick up Celia and Elaine. I am very glad I walked, the exercise done me good, but so did the talking.
Back in time to take chemo tablets and then the an hour later we have lunch. After lunch we go to buy Jack some wellington boots and meet Cathy in Thornbury for more coffee and cake, it was great to chat to Cathy, I  miss swimming with her.
We went to Jazz in the church this evening, but due to an overwhelming feeling sickness we left in the break. But we did enjoy it !!
Back home I am ready to rest.

I have decided mornings are good but due to the chemo and radio kicking in evenings are quite rubbish at the moment.   So batten done the hatch to get through the next 2 weeks!!!

A good day

My usual dog walk . Janet and Toby came  today. I am getting used to the  morning walk and I feel good in the mornings.
Sally took me to the appointment today which was great, we had a coffee and went into one shop.
I am now a bit bored of shopping !!
At the hospital F machine was running a little late, but that was ok as in that time I had my bloods taken. There is a new couple that have the same time as us that are very nice so we chat to them. It is the man that goes for treatment and the lady is great, it is so easy to talk about your illness when you in hospital  as everyone there is going through stuff. I find it hard  with anyone outside the hospital.
My treatment was very quick  and the traffic was not bad so home earlier than we expected. On the way home I had phoned mum to give me a life to Thornbury to collect a sick note from the doctors, I also went in the leisure Centre to cancel my membership(sad moment) as I can not swim. It was the regular staff and they were great !!  Back home I am tired, my head is sore, so I do take some paracetamol . I have a sleep and cuddle up to Bertie.
Another night in as not feeling good. We will have to get back to dog training.  

A little moan, this evening I have felt so sick, so hunting out sickness bands which I was told would help. Should have used them a while ago when I was given the advice, but the sickness has not been this bad, the usual diet coke and ginger biscuits have not touched it.  I do feel better now that I have moaned .....

Cabot Tower today

Elaine picked me up early today so we could go sight seeing. We walked up Cabot Tower and it was great, lovely views over Bristol. There is so much to do in Bristol and we never do . After the walk we had a coffee and Elaine said it felt like we were on holiday. So we are making the most of each day.  We arrive early for treatment and some of the regulars are there and also some new people, but we still manage to chat, Elaine even chats to a new man when I have my treatment, for the first time today it did not go quickly and I was ready to have the mask off!!
Back home all I have done is rested.  Celia popped in for a cup of tea, which was great.
This evening all I am doing is Watching Death In Paradise as I have got a headache and feel sick.
John has gone the  sailing club  AGM . I was hoping to go,  but it is cold so I am better off at home..

Elaine at the top of the tower !!

The Club

Before I talk about the club I say another good walk with Emma and Betsy in the fields. I was also impressed with Bertie, normally when a dog comes into the house he goes from a lovely cocker pooh to a monster, but not today, he did not mind her sniffing around the kitchen :)  Training must be working.
Mum and Sally took me today. We passed the homeless girl on the way out and again I gave her some sweets, she makes me curious and I would love to learn more!!  The usual coffee and then to the hospital where I meet the same people having treatment and yes it does feel like a club. There is a main waiting room, then a little side one by F machine where I have my treatment, I go there.. when  one of the gentleman got called in he joked with the radiographer that he was too busy chatting.... I always go in after him. There was also another lady who is there a lot and she was having a really bad day, transport brought her in 3 hours early, I chatted  about my bad day and how we find the outside world a scary place and in the hospital is a safe place, after my appointment we stayed and chatted with this lady till she was called in as she was on her own. It was an honor to meet this lady..
Back home and Mum came in for lunch , we had lovely Irish bread which Sally had brought back. Mum only stayed a short while as I needed my afternoon nap and I like the house to be empty. Tonight I am  spending in as the nausea is really kicking in at the moment. An early night .

The homless girl

My day starts with a walk with Judy and Slinky, although I did not feel like walking at all. I am struggling emotionally at the moment and I am not sure how to process some thoughts, so I am finding meeting people hard, the nurse said we all hit a wall and I have hit mine, I would like to find the door!!  Anyway the walk was very good.  I got home and mum picked me up to go to hospital, today job was to buy running trainers for Sophie at the running shop, they were very good.
Going into oncology feels very safe and I see so many familiar faces, the treatment is not a chore, it is a safe haven !!
After the treatment we go to the car park where I give the homeless girl, early 20's some sweets and chat to her, I have seen her most days and I have walked past, I walk not walk past again, I may not give her money , but I will talk to her and give her some food. I do wonder what her story is. My outcome may not be good but I have had a very good life !!!
 Mum just drops us off as I am tired and I cancel seeing Janet as I just need to sleep and I have strong need to be on my own with Bertie. Sophie pops out too.
In the evening I splash out and go to the Harvester  with Sophie and Julie. A very good meal. We then go to Tesco as I have ran out of thing. After that I am tired , head home.  At home I head for the shower as it unwinds me, the downside of this is that , my hair really comes out and it is still coming out.

Sailing Club Galley today, then walking

John was sailing on a different boat today and I was doing galley. We arrived at the club with the soup made, Sue had also bought in pies, the question was how many do we put in the oven?. I did not have a clue and I should know what I am doing!!. Joan counted the boats and 30 went in.   While they were cooking Jack and Brenda came up, so did Alicia  , Tom's girlfriend and I spent plenty of time chatting while Joan and Sophie walked Bertie.
Mark a friend of ours who is only a tiny bit younger than me, a few days younger to be more precise but   I am sure he looks older!!! ha ha. He phoned his wife Tina  who was at the mail with their 18 year son buying and Apple watch to say I was there and they came to the club on their way home.
 To say it was good to see Tina  was an understatement, I see Mark all the time at the club. We have been friends scene I met John at 19..Mark first then he was very lucky to meet Tina.   The club house  was busy and more friends came down and we were one of the last to leave again....
  Forgot to say head is less sore, but I am wearing the full scarf when I am out but at home now Sophie has got used to seeing the bold patch, though she does getting annoyed when I play with hair and it comes out !!!
I had a sleep when I got home. Bertie really cuddled up to me then Sophie and I spent an hour or so sorting her bedroom out.
Walking was as good as ever,  4 miles tonight. It was icy, so had to go careful under foot. I also felt queasy for some of it and to keep going when I feel queasy is a mind over matter game.  Back home writing the blog and I still feel sick ( I am never sick and it reminds me of morning sickness, I had it with both girls)
Hospital tomorrow, mum and Sophie are taking me and we are going to buy Sophie a pair of trainers from the running shop near the hospital.

New Year Day

Thank you Denise, hope you like the models

First New Year Eve was brilliant, a lovely meal of lamb cooked by mum and a game of cards afterwards, we play a game  which I am not sure of the name. You have 2 pack of cards, each player has 10 cards each, then on  the first game you have to get 4 of a kind, second a game  4of a a run, then 5  of the above, then it gets interesting with 4 of kind and a run, then the final games is 8 of a run, we all paly with good humor and there is a lot of banter, do not sit behind Celia , John or Phil, say no more.  They call me the nanny Wilmott giving cards away, but I have tactics.  Grampy  Reg was the worse for tactics
I do love cards and played whist every week when I was 14 with Mum, nanny Joyce and Aunty Joan I only stopped when I discovered  pubs and boys !!
Back to New year, we celebrated with Champagne and Old Lang Sign. know the words very well as they have meaning for me, as I never forget the family that we have lost !!

On to today, not much at all really. I spent the day tidying up and being boring. O I did make some soup for tomorrow for the galley at the sailing club and Sophie has decided I need the full cover up on my head, luckily for me  Denise Mums cousin sent me a present of 2 head scarfs for when I lose my hair, so I have worn them today, they are great, so this is my new look.  The only thing I am not sure of is that they say cancer, but I have cancer  and I d not want a wig. ugg.
This evening I will do even less, but I am feeling better for doing nothing !!